Random Life Stories

[mattbowen]

Hi

After all my stories, how about we all tell each other random life stories, good or bad. Do not enter crude or rude stories though

Ill get his started!!!

When i was about 4 or 5, I was at the zoo. I really loved giraffes and wanted to see them. We had to go across the Kangaroo paddock though where you were allowed to feed them and stuff. I didnt like Kangaroos.
We started to go across and I panicked. I started to run across to quickly get to the giraffes and miss the kangaroos. I must have scared one or threatened it though.

One kangaroo ran straight beside me and kicked me in the head. It knocked me over and flung my glasses off my face. It really hurt and I was crying. I dont really remember it though

Everyone thought it was bad at the time and ran to me, but now they see the funny side

 

[Essellohbeebeewhy]

my mate had his bucks show at a go kart track, mick has a huge nose (think peter sterling) and he was coming back from the bathroom and didnt realise the glass door was to his right and walked straight into it, i was in tears for 20 mintues, its funny when someone walks into a glass door but dead set a killer when he's 24 with a huge nose! same night after our go karts, another mate organised some of the seediest strippers....one got to work on a lollipop and made it disappear, it then re appeard and our mate nath decided he wanted it so he asked for it and proceed to put it his mouth, THEN she got out a water pistol and made the mistake of giving it to yours truely, she got sat in front of me about 8-10 meters away spread her legs and asked me to squirt, the great one being a great shot decided it would be more fun if i sprayed her in the face.....i couldnt contain my laughter as i repeatedly sprayed her in the face. ive got more stories!! this really isnt a thread for me

 

[mattbowen]

Hahah. Say more, but the last won was a bit crude.

G rated please.

 

[Warney]

I got attacked by a "innocent bunny rabbit"

 

[Tricolour]

who cares if its not g rated

 

[GMB#8]

well i got stabbed and all this blood n guts went everywhere then i chased the guy and slit hes throat and he bleed everywhere then some guy shot me and i was spewing blood! and all
g rated

 

[MARK755]

What happen to g rated

 

[BoondasH1]

so, how long before this thread gets closed?

 

[Essellohbeebeewhy]

about 20 mins all star cards is licking his lips about another padlock...good thread idea though..some of us just have a bit more random stories than others.

 

[aprec8]

ive got a story like slobs first one and there is a video to go with it but its way out of place here but laughs aplenty at the end of the day the pimp caught us filming this girl and she ran out the door (with extras)

 

[exzibit3]

I've got a story that will leave you guys hanging on the edge of your seats! It's a story of crime and passion, of greed and manipulation, of smut and deception but it's got a great ending. I'll post after 10 replies. Or tomorrow, whatever.

 

[dannyboy4]

running inside 4 my birthday cake didnt see the hammock ( hope u no what that is ) and did a double spin and landed on my head

 

[ljandkg]

When I was in Nam I was primed......ready for action, I burst into a clearing and Charlie were everywhere, I took em on singlehandedly etc etc....

Mattbowen, u think that Kanga kick might explain a few things???

 

[howzat]

That's my swingset, and that's my sandbox. I'm not allowed to go in the deep end. And this is where I met the leprechaun.
He told me to burn things.

 

[matskees_01]

That's my swingset, and that's my sandbox. I'm not allowed to go in the deep end. And this is where I met the leprechaun.
He told me to burn things.

We must have known the same leprechaun. Hehe

 

[midnight_show]

My first 24 hours in London in 2001, I saw :

A guy get hauled out of his car and arrested.
A hit and run, the guy in the car that hit the cyclist jumped out his car, over the bridge into the river, police boats and choppers had lights in the later looking for him.
A guy getting beaten up by three other dudes.
A sandwich.
Too many side show entartaining freaks to mention.
A busker get his guitar smashed by a pakistani shop keeper for playing in his shop entry.
A big red bus hit a dude, but I think he lived.

Good times.

 

[Essellohbeebeewhy]

I've got a story that will leave you guys hanging on the edge of your seats! It's a story of crime and passion, of greed and manipulation, of smut and deception but it's got a great ending. I'll post after 10 replies. Or tomorrow, whatever.

post it now!

 

[axeman23]

My first 24 hours in London in 2001, I saw :

A guy get hauled out of his car and arrested.
A hit and run, the guy in the car that hit the cyclist jumped out his car, over the bridge into the river, police boats and choppers had lights in the later looking for him.
A guy getting beaten up by three other dudes.
A sandwich.
Too many side show entartaining freaks to mention.
A busker get his guitar smashed by a pakistani shop keeper for playing in his shop entry.
A big red bus hit a dude, but I think he lived.

Good times.

Haha! Nice! Always fun hearing about travel stories, especially the bad ones... I remember when I went to the Philippines the first time with my mate who grew up there, we were walking through his old neighborhood in Manilla. He walked away to buy some drinks for us, just on the other side of the road. Anyway, this fella about our age, maybe a few years younger, (23 at the time), walks up to me with a mini ice-pick. I was looking at the pick, then looking around for the ice he needed it for: Obviously, there was no ice in sight. Anyway, he gets right up in front of me and tells me to give him my wallet or he'll stab me. I pretty much froze up, and said the first thing that came out of my mouth: "What are you gonna stab me with?", to which he holds up the pick...

Needless to say, I went straight for my wallet, and was in the process of taking off my watch, when my mate I came with walked up. "What's going on here?" he asked. "Umm, I'm being mugged, he's got a friggin ICE-PICK!" So he looks at the fella, then come out with "Hey, Jun! What the hell u mugging my friend for?" The guy all of a sudden stops, at hearing this apparent stranger say his name. My mate introduces himself, says he used to be in the same gang until he moved to Australia. So still holding the pick in 1 hand, he calls one of the older guys that my mate remembers. After my mate has a quick chat on the phone, the guy apologizes, gives my wallet and watch back, and invites us for a drink-up that night...

 

[A1CardsandGaming]

Haha! Nice! Always fun hearing about travel stories, especially the bad ones... I remember when I went to the Philippines the first time with my mate who grew up there, we were walking through his old neighborhood in Manilla. He walked away to buy some drinks for us, just on the other side of the road. Anyway, this fella about our age, maybe a few years younger, (23 at the time), walks up to me with a mini ice-pick. I was looking at the pick, then looking around for the ice he needed it for: Obviously, there was no ice in sight. Anyway, he gets right up in front of me and tells me to give him my wallet or he'll stab me. I pretty much froze up, and said the first thing that came out of my mouth: "What are you gonna stab me with?", to which he holds up the pick...

Needless to say, I went straight for my wallet, and was in the process of taking off my watch, when my mate I came with walked up. "What's going on here?" he asked. "Umm, I'm being mugged, he's got a friggin ICE-PICK!" So he looks at the fella, then come out with "Hey, Jun! What the hell u mugging my friend for?" The guy all of a sudden stops, at hearing this apparent stranger say his name. My mate introduces himself, says he used to be in the same gang until he moved to Australia. So still holding the pick in 1 hand, he calls one of the older guys that my mate remembers. After my mate has a quick chat on the phone, the guy apologizes, gives my wallet and watch back, and invites us for a drink-up that night...

What a great story mate

A friend of mine got mugged over that way said he was legless and got offered a lift... turned out to be a mugging, he took out his money and threw it in the air before running for it another Local says "hey aussie, u want some dope or good drug" he says nah mate just leave me alone, i was just robbed.... the local then says " I am Police (shows his badge) and I will take you to your hotel" ..... lucky my mate stays away from the drugs hey

 

[axeman23]

What a great story mate

A friend of mine got mugged over that way said he was legless and got offered a lift... turned out to be a mugging, he took out his money and threw it in the air before running for it another Local says "hey aussie, u want some dope or good drug" he says nah mate just leave me alone, i was just robbed.... the local then says " I am Police (shows his badge) and I will take you to your hotel" ..... lucky my mate stays away from the drugs hey

Yeah, overall its a great place to visit: Cheap, tasty food, cheap alcohol, nice beaches, and for the most part friendly people. But a couple of times I took a wrong turn down an alley, and all of a sudden the faces are less friendly and you're getting watched a lot too closely for your liking. I remember there was a big market in a place called Baguio there, I went in there with a few friends. But when I get interested in something, I sort of get tunnel vision, not concentrating on where I'm going. I was looking at the souvenir stalls and just following the tables along, turning here and there without looking up. Then I came to the edge of the market, which was a dead-end. I turned around thinking it would be simple to retrace my steps, but soon found out there were branches through the stalls everywhere. I started panicking because I didn't have a phone and couldn't see any of my friends. On top of that, as I looked around no-one was smiling, the way they had been near the entrance to the market. I took off down a couple of branches and met with a few more dead ends. Then I found a path that didn't end as quickly as the others, but didn't seem to be familiar, either. In the end I just sat down in a corner and hoped my friends would find me. After a while, a lady who owned a stall I bought something from saw me while she was walking, and helped me get back to where my friends where. There was a lot of interesting stuff there, but I never went back...